First, a confession: It is only relatively recently that I’ve discovered how to de-stress my mother (as opposed to distressing her – I’m pretty good at that, actually). And yes, I have only managed to spin this particular plate one, ever variable day of the year. Sometimes.
In my youth, a card and breakfast in bed was pretty much the limit of my powers. It wasn’t like the house would function if my mom downed tools for the day. And having never received a phone call from my father, I’m unsure whether he is capable of reserving seats at a restaurant. I suspect not. The one time I remember taking a trip out was to a Little Chef, which is insane no matter which way you cut it.
This year, “Mothering Sunday” has parked itself on April 3rd in the UK, which still gives us a little time to consider how we’re going to make this day a little more special…
Mother’s Day really is the least important day in the year.
At the risk of killing the golden goose, the very existence of Mother’s Day is an insult on some level. We all have those pretentious or just plain lazy friends that object to Valentine’s day because ‘Romantic Love should be a 365 day thing’. Well, a similar and more genuine complaint can be leveled at Mother’s Day. Few Mothers look forward to Mother’s Day. For most, it’s merely a scheduled gap in the ongoing violence of parenting. Show your mother respect on the other 364 days a year and she may just begin to think of the day as less of an amnesty and more as ‘her day’.
Don’t do what you did last year.
Another thing to take from the comment above is that mixing things up from year to year doesn’t hurt. So your Mother has a favorite getaway, favorite flower, favorite play? There are 364 other days in a year to surprise her with those things. There’s nothing that says ‘I love you, but I don’t really know you’ better than falling back on gifting the first thing a person displays a preference for, year after year. Everyone likes surprises.
One gesture isn’t enough.
Mother’s Day should have a schedule, rather than a one off gift or gesture. Lots of smaller gestures will be inexpensive to set around the main event. The more children a mother has, the easier this is, since everyone can pitch in, even if it’s only with a card, small gift and a phone call from older children. Breakfast in bed is a fine idea, but it will only set a mother up for disappointment if that’s all she’s getting.
Mother’s Day is a day for doing something.
‘Relaxation’ is a word we tend to get hung up on for Mother’s Day, and it’s one of the reasons why so many Mother’s Days are spent doing nothing at all. It’s lazy, and it displays a disregard or simple lack of insight when it comes to the things that make your mother tick. Yes, ‘relaxing’ is something that many mothers want from this day, but that should mean you’re searching for spa deals rather than sitting her in front of the TV all day. And perhaps going to see a show or going on a nice long walk round a country house is her idea of ‘Relaxation’?
Gifts are part of the package, not the main event. Even those days we traditionally associate with gifts (Birthdays, Christmases) are really about the parties, dinners and meet ups we have. Gifting an event or getaway will make for a truly memorable Mother’s day.
About the author: Steph Wood is a blogger and copywriter working for www.thesanctuary.co.uk, hoping that you’ll give extra consideration to your mother this year!
Credits: Photo courtesy of EraPhernalia Vintage.