Money is a tricky subject in a marriage. On one hand, sharing your life with someone means combining your finances and choosing to live within a single budget. On the other, your spouse’s spending habits or flexible saving rituals may drive you crazy.
How do you find balance when your financial and emotional health intertwine? Follow these tips to get the conversation started:
1 – Put your opinions on the table.
Loving your spouse doesn’t mean that the two of you agree all the time. You may have completely different perspectives when it comes to money. This fact isn’t necessarily a deal-breaker unless you fail to talk about it. Miscommunication can cause your relationship to spiral out of control. Why is your husband angry that you made a big purchase without consulting him? Why is your wife upset that you paid the rent a few days late?
The answers lie in an open conversation. Air out your differences before tackling the finer points of spending and savings. Express your opinion calmly and listen to your spouse with respect. If savings are important to you, list your reasons. If a low account balance makes you feel anxious, explain your trepidation. The bottom line: this conversation is critical to achieving mutual goals. Don’t avoid it.
2 – Be honest about your shortcomings.
You’re probably well aware of the challenges you face with money. Newsflash: your spouse is aware of it, too. Financial instability stems from a couple’s unwillingness to examine the larger issues. Now is the time to face facts about bad habits and financial shortcomings. You may love to shop, but have you ever considered the effects on your budget? You may talk about saving for retirement, but how often to you contribute to your IRA? Acknowledge the faults in yourself and ask your spouse to do the same. Change is possible if you want it.
3 – Create a plan together.
With your financial dirty laundry on the table, it’s time to clean house. Begin by discussing:
- How you would like things to improve in everyday life
- Future goals and the funds needed to achieve them
- Remaining problems that require more attention
Work together to create a budget and long-term savings plan. It’s also a good idea to divvy up the responsibilities according to your individual strengths. For example, if your wife is better with savings, allow her to manage the retirement accounts. If your husband loves to score a deal, let him handle the grocery shopping on coupon days.
However you decide to split the work, collaboration is the larger goal. Developing a plan together will help you become accountable to one another and more conscious of the way you spend. Why risk your happiness when a solution is right in front of you? Recognize the value of your partnership and work to strengthen it in every area.
About the author: This guest post was provided by Lexington Law, a credit repair law firm that helps people repair their bad credit.
Credits: Photo courtesy of Nelson Kwok.